Jessica Yaniv Simpson Sleeping On Miriam’s Patio; Raising a Puppy

Every time I think this family can’t get more messed up they go and prove me horribly wrong. We’ve heard some great rumours this week and we’re excited to share the latest gossip about Jessica Yaniv Simpson, Miriam Yaniv, and Ilana Altmann with you.

To be clear, we don’t have proof, but our source seems knowledgeable and reliable. I have no reason to doubt this to be true – especially when you consider who we’re talking about.

First, Yaniv has been hiding at mommy’s apartment for some time now. He’s afraid of LangleyResident and others and he thinks his mommy can protect him. I can believe that. Miriam bailed him out of every ounce of trouble he ever had growing up and there’s nobody on earth that wants to stay in his condo with him. I can see him staying there.

But, Miriam has a one bedroom condo – the same size, possibly smaller than JY’s, at a measly 590 square feet.

jessica yaniv simpson condo miriam yaniv

According to our source, Ilana is sleeping in the bedroom, Miriam on the couch, and JY is literally sleeping on the patio outside. Free MeowMix merch to anyone who can get drone footage.

We’ve also heard that they have a new puppy, possibly a lab, and it’s staying there. So that’s Miriam, Ilana, Jon the Con, and TWO dogs in one 590 square foot 4th floor condo. How often do you think Jon’s puppy is getting it’s required exercise?

Apparently Jon has been denied a real service dog by several Canadian agencies and decided that he would make his own, so he adopted a puppy and he’s calling it a service animal. He says he’s going to train it himself.

Jon hasn’t even learned how to wipe his ass or brush his air and he thinks he can train a lab (a notoriously energetic working breed) to be a service animal while he sits at home diddling his mom and aunt? Right.

It would be a shame if anyone was to contact the Strata association and let them know that 55-ton-Jon is living at Miriam’s 55+ condo full time. That explains why they’re moving furniture around Miriam’s balcony every night.

We’ve also heard that the Strata that Miriam (and now Jon) are suing previously agreed to let Miriam install smoke/fire alarms that better met her needs. That wasn’t good enough for Miriam. She wanted the Strata to pay. When Strata said nope, she sued.

That sounds about right. This fucked up family can’t pay their own way for anything (unless it’s to stalk trust-fund-catfish across the country).

So, to wrap this up, Jon is a chicken shit coward that thinks he can train a service dog up and he’s living with his elderly mom and aunt to hide his latest con from Langley Resident. Now he thinks he can train up a service animal and he’ll be suing people (or filing human rights complaints) all over the place.

Update: here’s the tiny ass condo they’re all living in.

To report Yaniv for animal abuse, contact the BC SPCA Surrey Education and Adoption Centre at (604) 574-1711. Refer to past stories about Yaniv’s animal abuse on MeowMix. We will be watching to see if the dog is exercised and report a lack of sightings as animal abuse as well. Puppies need room to run. The only thing Yaniv’s run is their mouths. It would be a real shame if someone was to rescue the dog from Yaniv and give it a proper home.

To report the Yaniv’s for abuse of the buildings 55+ rules, contact the Strata BCS1359 by writing to The Owners, 8880 202 street, Langley, BC, V1M 4E7. They can fine Miriam for violating building rules. This could include reporting that she’s subletting part of her condo to Jon for business purposes, according to legal docs.

To catch the show yourself, Down2Earth cafe is on the corner right between the pedocondo and the crowded condo. MeowMix will happily post any pictures you take!

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